Better than a Hallelujah

Late at night laying here thinking, praying for special people in my life. I always wonder how it is exactly when God puts someone on my heart to pray for.  I've learned to listen to the Spirit's promptings and go with it.

We pour out our miseries, God just hears a melody. - Amy Grant "Better than a Hallelujah" the honest cries of breaking hearts.

I know that my God works with broken hearts. You see I've had my heart broken so badly that I used to not want to live. The despair I felt led me to the end of myself and quantum leaps closer to my Lord. It was deep in the despair that I met God on a level I did not know was possible this side of heaven.

My journey took me through addiction, an abusive marriage, a divorce, failed health and more than one trip to the hospital for severe depression. Why don't people in the church talk about this stuff? I would wager that there are many, even within my own church tonight, who are struggling to hold on.  Why do Christians often shoot their wounded? 

I believe a lot of Christians and churches shoot their wounded because they are unwilling to look at pain, unwilling to admit that we don't have all the answers to the hurt we encounter down here. Yes we have the Bible but even it is silent about some things. Some parts of this puzzle we live simply won't be revealed this side if heaven.

So we live with a partial disconnect, a realization that we were not made for this world and that we won't know WHY to a lot of questions of our faith until we fall into the arms of Jesus.

The closer I know God the more questions I have.