When they leave me after their time with me my heart breaks every single time. We were meant to be together and nothing can change that. I tell them what I can to heal their hearts but ultimately have to leave them in God's care. Wanting to hold them, to cuddle with them and tell them "nice things." Wanting them to know that mommy didn't choose to leave them, that she wants to be with them and isn't allowed.
Tired of being reasonable. Frustrated with the system, with attorneys and with the whole process. I want my children NOW. Not in a month, not in 6 months. NOW. I want to help them heal, to start a new life.
Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary. My heart is torn between unrequited love, the kind that I meant when I said "I do" and extreme sadness and pain because I know that we will never be together again unless God does a miracle.
Tomorrow is another day and I march on. I choose not to be bitter. I choose LIFE.
No comments:
Post a Comment