Who do I want to be?

Big change takes big courage.  It also takes a great amount of stamina.  A lot of us wish that we could just close our eyes, blow out a candle on a birthday cake and we would get our wish.  I know for me, in my life, change sometimes comes through great pain.  I mean, do we ever change on our own volition?  Or do we feel compelled to change because we feel pain of some sort?  

As much as I'd like to avoid pain just like the next guy, I have realized over the years that God can use our pain to make us more like Him.  To make us more into His image.  Feeling intense pain can cause us to look at what needs to change and evaluate how we're going to change.  For me, that means asking God to do the changing.  

So here I sit, in the middle of intense pain in my life saying "God, change me".  I really mean it.  If I have to go through this pain I hope that He'll bless me with some change.  Change that comes from pain is like a gift.  And we never forget where we learned it from because it comes at a great cost.