Brighter Day

Today was a much brighter day than yesterday.  This morning I got to be with "my" kids at church, next we they will be second graders!  Unreal.  Tomorrow my oldest starts school.  I need to remember to get up early so that I can be there, waiting.  Even though tomorrow isn't my day with them I will not let this go by without sharing it with her.

I need to just make it through the next couple of weeks to a month.  I need to give myself some grace and mercy and be good to myself.  Lately the thoughts of self-condemnation have come back into my mind.  My mind often tries to do me in...!  Thoughts, long engrained, of not being good enough are what I struggle with.  I only have so much energy and I have to choose what I do with it.  Sometimes that means that certain chores don't get done but it always means that I pour my life into my children.  THAT will never change.  Right now whether the table gets dusted or this or that doesn't get done isn't as important as whether or not my children are learning about God, others and themselves.  Working on our relationship.  Learning to become this little family of 3 now.

I've treated myself to a pizza and it's on its way.  Yeah!  Yum.  Lunch/dinner combo.  Add some pop and it's yum in my tum.

Today I apologized for the way I acted yesterday (even though I still think that I was right) but did it for the sake of the relationship.   Sometimes with family you make consessions.

I really  just want to make it through the rest of the day, maybe do a load of laundry, I'm doing the dishes now, and then call my kids on the phone and their dad had better let them answer or have them call back.

Thank you, my mostly silent followers for listening to this lady being REAL.